


Our Last Summer

by KateLouisaRose



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: First Love, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-13
Updated: 2016-04-13
Packaged: 2018-06-02 02:50:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,229
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6547642
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KateLouisaRose/pseuds/KateLouisaRose
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The last summer Merlin and Will spend together.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Our Last Summer

Merlin flattened himself against the crumbling wall of Matthew’s hut, fumbling with the heavy weight of his ‘sword’; flakes of bark sticking to his sweaty palms as he held out the stick just as he had practised. He fought to control his unsteady breathing, stifling gasping breaths by pressing his lips together and forcing himself to breathe slowly and evenly through his nose.

“You’re terrible at hiding, do you know that?” came the familiar voice from around the corner. “You sound like a horse.”

Merlin grinned.

“This coming from the boy who once hid in a potato sack to avoid bath time when he was twelve,” Merlin panted. There was a flurry of movement and his friend lunged towards him brandishing a long stick and jabbing disarming blows at his ribs.

“I was _nine,_ ” Will growled, pressing Merlin back against the wall with his stick. “And it was winter!”

Merlin leapt towards him, parrying Will’s weaker strikes and driving him back a few steps. Their sticks collided with a hollow sound in a steady rhythm, until they both moved at once and ended up face to face, locked in a stalemate.

Will’s eyes flicked back and forth between Merlin’s. A bead of sweat collected at his hairline and skidded slowly down his temple.

“You were twelve.” Merlin said breathlessly, and Will’s expression hardened angrily, and Merlin knew he was about to be beaten. Will pushed him back with a growl, keeping him down with a few strong blows and kicking his feet from under him; tumbling Merlin to the floor without so much as a hesitation in between.

Merlin glared up at him while also trying not to smile. Will extended his hand and Merlin grabbed it, letting his friend haul him upright. Will pulled him very close and whispered threateningly, “I win.”

“Twelve.” Merlin whispered back, cuffing Will round the head and swiftly ducking out of a headlock. Will stood glaring at him, panting again.

“I’ll get you later, Mer.” He threatened with a crooked grin, turning on his heel and resting the stick on his shoulder.

“Yeah, whatever you say. See you.” Merlin replied with a mock salute, swinging his own stick in a lazy arc.

The sun was beginning to set, and they both had to lend a hand in the fields in the evenings now that the days were too hot to work the ground in the daytime. They had been granted a few days of freedom, a luxury not many of the other young men could afford. But they were young and reckless, and the summer stretched languidly before them, filled with endless possibilities and long, hazy days which blended seamlessly together in the sizzling heat.

They met one another again a few hours later, trekking back from the fields, filthy with dirt and sweat which dried in grimy streaks across their faces and chests beneath their loose cotton shirts. Merlin was dragging a heavy sack behind him filled with onions. Will traipsed behind, fringe hanging limply in front of his face. His mother was constantly pestering him to allow her to cut it. He flicked the hair out of his eyes again and heaved his own sack over his shoulder. Merlin watched as Will passed a bottle of sweet cider between the other boys, passing it across to Merlin, who took a swig and handed it back with a tired smile. A couple of the lads had begun to sing an old bawdy tune about taking a lass for a roll in the hay during harvest, and Merlin joined in on the chorus. His eyes felt heavy and his feet were beginning to drag, but Will threw an arm around his shoulders and sang tunelessly in his ear, and Merlin let himself get pulled into some awkward imitation of a line dance with five other men kicking the air and slurring tipsily at the orange horizon.

The boys parted ways at Merlin’s hut, laughter gradually subsiding. They could still hear Richard and Peter tripping drunkenly down the dirt road to their own homes and for a moment he and Will listened, grinning at one another.

“Right, well, see you tomorrow then.” Merlin said with a cheerful smile. Will nodded mutely, cheeks a little red from the drink. He scuffed his foot in the dirt.

“Yeah,” he said softly. Merlin gave him a little wave and went to duck inside his hut before a thought struck him.

“Will?” He said suddenly, turning back. He barely had time to blink before his friend moved towards him.

Will had always been very passionate, very strong minded. So when he whipped around sharply at the mention of his name and grabbed Merlin roughly around the back of the neck, Merlin saw no moment of indecision as Will swept in and sealed his lips firmly over Merlin’s. Merlin just froze, completely dumbstruck by the sensation of Will gripping his neck almost painfully, the way his lips fit perfectly around Merlin’s own, and the desperation which was radiating from the surprising heat of Will’s body against his. Cautiously, Merlin opened his eyes, one hand resting hesitantly on Will’s ribs. Will had his eyes squeezed tightly shut, so tight that Merlin knew that there were little coloured spots dancing behind his eyelids along with the frantic thudding of his heartbeat, his lips a bruising pressure and nothing but a chaste press of skin against skin. Will pulled away very suddenly, lips flushed red. Merlin stared at him helplessly. They looked at one another warily. Will shrugged.

“Got you,” he mumbled, before jogging quickly into the night.

Merlin stood silently for some moments. Slowly, he raised his hand and touched the pad of his thumb to his bottom lip, which was throbbing tenderly. Will kissed like he fought, with brutality and determination, and Merlin found that he loved it. 

He stumbled giddily inside and kicked off his boots, falling into the pile of blankets on the floor with a huff, not bothering to clean his face. He fell asleep with his fingers covering his mouth, as though he could preserve the sensation of Will’s kiss until the morning.

* * *

When Merlin wandered out of his hut early the next morning, his mother was already hanging their clothes out on the drying rack. He gave her a fond smile and offered to help but she sent him away again, merely pleased that he had bathed and no longer smelled of onions. Will was waiting behind their hut, one leg bent against the mud wall and playing with a loose thread on his shirt. Merlin stood in front of him expectantly.

“Hey,” he said. Will grunted softly, not meeting his gaze. After a moment Merlin shifted in irritation. “Well?” he asked, folding his arms.

“Look, I’m sorry about last night, it was stupid.” Merlin’s heart sank as Will raised his head forlornly.

Merlin swallowed, “I didn’t think it was stupid.” He answered, jostling Will’s shoulder.

“I’m a bit messed up, I’m sorry. Let’s just forget it.” Will tried to walk away but Merlin caught his arm.

“I don’t want to forget it. It was…good.” Will looked at him suspiciously.

“Good?” He said at last. “You liked it?”

“Yeah,” Merlin said. “I liked it when you... _kissed_ me.” He whispered the last part conspiratorially, afraid of everything he had ever been told about people like him. You didn’t go around kissing other boys; Will’s mum said it was dirty.

Will’s expression softened. He searched Merlin’s face for any sign of dishonesty but found none.

“Well if you liked it then why didn’t you do anything, Mer?”

“Because you practically attacked me!” Merlin retorted indignantly. “I didn’t know what to do, one minute you were just my friend and then you were…you know.” Will was grinning now, bright and dangerous, like a flame.

“Want to do it again?” He asked eagerly, catching Merlin’s hand quickly. Merlin pulled himself free just as fast.

“What if someone sees?” Will looked around, pulling Merlin into the shade behind his hut.

“Nobody’s gonna’ see.” He murmured, his fingertips tracing the veins on the inside of Merlin’s wrist. Merlin shivered, experiencing Will’s anxiety and anticipation all in a wave of heat as the other boy stepped closer.

“Yeah, alright.”

Merlin looked at him from beneath dark lashes and licked his lips nervously. Will leant in, their noses bumped. Merlin smiled despite himself, their lips meeting again in an unhurried clash of teeth and soft skin. They laughed awkwardly into the kiss. Merlin tried to angle his head to the left at the same time as Will; they bashed heads, bit tongues, and eventually Will cradled Merlin’s jaw in both hands and tipped his head a little to the side, finally catching his lips and kissing him soundly. Merlin let out a small sigh as Will relaxed, his hands trailing slowly from Merlin’s jaw along his neck and into his hair. Merlin settled his hands on Will’s hips, slipping one hand beneath his friend’s shirt and enjoying the soft, forbidden warmth of Will’s skin.

They sprinted along the path, the heat of the sun already reaching its scorching peak a few hours before midday. The barn was deserted at this time of year. In the winter it was piled high with food – grain stores and potatoes and hay for the animals, but in the summer the two storey barn sat dormant and dappled with sunlight from the trees which surrounded it. Nobody went there unless it was for the same reason as them. Inside the sunlight filtered through the aching beams, dust sifting lazily through the air. It smelled of dried grass and horses, and Will pressed Merlin up against the door and covered his body with his own, sucking purple marks on his chalk-white skin. Merlin made soft, desperate noises which made Will shudder and kiss him breathless with joy. Merlin initially shied away from Will’s hot, wet tongue slipping tentatively against his, but realised that actually the sensation was rather nice, and began to chase it greedily, sucking on Will’s bottom lip, his breath hitching as Will ran a hand along the inside of his thigh.

“This is good, right? We’re good like this.” Will panted in his ear as Merlin threaded his fingers through Will’s shaggy hair.

“We are so much more than good,” Merlin replied elatedly. “Come on,” he dragged Will by the hand towards the back of the barn where the worn ladder rested against the top level. They climbed quickly, occasionally stumbling on the rungs, pulling themselves up onto the half-storey at the back of the barn. There were a few planks missing from the roof and the thatch had long since fallen away. The sunlight streamed in, hot and bright as they tripped onto the sturdy boards, caught up in the other’s arms.

Since the food was no longer stored there, the second level was empty aside from the few remaining nets of straw piled around the edges, contents spilling out to cover the floor in a musty golden carpet. Merlin led Will into the corner where it was cooler and the straw provided cushioning as Merlin pulled Will on top of him, kissing him frantically.

As the midday sun burned high in the sky, the two boys basked in all the freedom and happiness their secret space afforded them.  

“Merlin, oh gods,” Will arched into Merlin’s body as the other boy circled his hips atop him, bare skin soft and opalescent in the shade. Merlin’s eyes were closed blissfully, one hand running through Will’s hair slowly, dragging his nails against his scalp. The other rested on Will’s shoulder for balance as he moved slowly up and down.

Their clothes lay in a heap in one corner. They always undressed completely; they liked all the skin to touch and Merlin liked that it felt planned and relaxed, not illicit and hurried.

“Yeah, that’s it, _uh,_ ” Merlin gasped, grinning and angling his hips a little. Will gave another muffled groan. “Fuck, Merlin _yes._ ”

* * *

 

They lay together afterwards, Merlin's fingers combing through Will's hair, the sun warm on their bare skin.

"Mer?"

"Yeah?"

Will opened his mouth but shut it again helplessly.

"Nothing."

When they had kissed, for the first time, they were still boys. Merlin was still fresh faced and his smile was bright and open. Will was arrogant, reckless; they were both so _young._ Merlin’s hair curled around his ears, his jaw was narrow, his face still held that strange impression of having not quite filled in. Will’s shoulders were broad but his voice was not as deep as it would one day become. He was not a man, not quite, not yet. The first time they kissed, Will's eyes were intense and yet somehow, nervous and determined all at once.

Will rolled over and propped himself up on one elbow. Merlin looked at him, his eyes soft.

Then it was Merlin's turn to open his mouth to say something and shut it again mutely. He tried to ignore what he might have said. _I'm leaving. I'll miss you. I'm sorry._

They looked at one another, and then Merlin kissed him, and everything they might have said was lost in clutching hands and breathless grunts, and the summer stretched out before them like fresh parchment, and they pretended that it would never end.


End file.
